Shame Edition

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Join our esteemed presenters Deran Young, Terry Real, and Pat Ogden for a careful examination of how we identify shame and its immediate, persistent, and generational impacts on our lives. This exclusive event features unique experiential content from these 3 leading experts.

Deran Young

Terry Real

Pat Ogden

Full Event Recordings

Receive instant, lifetime access to the full 3-day event recordings. Includes video recordings for the main presentations and warmups, plus audio recordings for the main presentations. Presenters slides and transcripts are also included.

We feel shame in our bodies – mortification in the pit of our stomach, an aching in our chest, seething anger with no home but inside ourselves, shame can activate an overwhelming desire to bury failure and prevent deep connection that we know is so critical to a full life. These feelings are unbearable, paralyzing, and we are biologically disincentivized to unpack and shed light on them because of the deeply visceral and uncomfortable sensations we experience when we revisit our shame and humiliation.

Those painful feelings mean no one wants to talk about shame, but we collectively experience it in both personal and professional settings and it snakes and winds its way through our lives unspoken, ever present, waiting to emerge when our tiptoeing around it is broken by a misstep. It make us fearful of taking risks, suffocating our creativity and causing us to shrink away from healthy risk taking that might produce failure. It diminishes our sense of worthiness and impacts our capacity to make connections with the people around us.

During this Master Series, we welcome esteemed presenters Deran Young, Terry Real, and Pat Ogden for a careful examination of how we identify shame and its immediate, persistent, and generational impacts on our lives. We will consider the important distinctions between guilt and shame, examine collective legacy burdens and how we confront and heal from them, begin to shift from harsh self-perceptions toward self compassion that demands empathic accountability, and look closely at how shame manifests in our bodies.

Our Speakers

Deran Young

Deran Young is a licensed therapist, CDWF, CDTL, co-Author of New York Times Best Seller, You Are Your Best Thing, retired military officer, and the founder of Black Therapists Rock. Black Therapists Rock is a non profit organization that mobilizes over 30,000 mental health professionals committed to reducing the psychological impact of systemic oppression and intergenerational trauma. She obtained her social work degree from University of Texas, where she studied abroad in Ghana, West Africa for two semesters creating a high school counseling center for under-resourced students.

Deran describes herself as someone who loves to learn from various cultures and has visited over 37 different countries and her clinical experience spans across four different continents. Her passion for culture and people has led her to become a highly sought after diversity and inclusion consultant working with companies like BBERG, Facebook, Linked In, Field Trip Health, and YWCA. Deran’s advocacy expands over several online and offline platforms. With a current social media audience of over 100,000 followers on IG and Facebook, Deran has become a leading influencer and public figure committed to spreading mental health awareness and improving health equity. She resides in the Washington DC area and continues to explore the world with her 9 year old son. For more information, visit

Terry Real

Terry Real is a nationally recognized family therapist, author, and teacher. He is particularly known for his groundbreaking work on men and male psychology as well as his work on gender and couples; he has been in private practice for over thirty years. Terry has appeared often as the relationship expert for Good Morning America and ABC News. His work has been featured in numerous academic articles as well as media venues such as Oprah, 20/20, The Today Show, CNN, The New York Times, The Wall Street Journal, Psychology Today and many others.

In 1997 he published the national bestseller: I Don’t Want To Talk About It, the first book ever written on the topic of male depression. That was followed by two more successful books on relationships offering practical guides for couples and couples therapists; and most recently his New York Times Bestseller Us: Getting Past You & Me to Build a More Loving Relationship. Terry founded The Relational Life Institute. The Institute offers a training program for therapists as well as workshops for couples and individuals.

For more information on his work, please visit his website,

Pat Ogden

Pat Ogden, PhD, (she/her) is a pioneer in somatic psychology, the creator of the Sensorimotor Psychotherapy method, and founder of the Sensorimotor Psychotherapy Institute. Dr. Ogden is trained in a wide variety of somatic and psychotherapeutic approaches and has over 45 years of experience working with individuals and groups. She is a co-founder of the Hakomi Institute, past faculty of Naropa University (1985-2005), a clinician, consultant, and sought after international lecturer.

Dr. Ogden is the first author of two groundbreaking books in somatic psychology: Trauma and the Body: A Sensorimotor Approach to Psychotherapy and Sensorimotor Psychotherapy: Interventions for Trauma and Attachment (2015) both published in the Interpersonal Neurobiology Series of W. W. Norton. Her third book The Pocket Guide to Sensorimotor Psychotherapy in Context (2021) advocates for an anti-racist, anti-oppression perspective in psychotherapy practice. She is currently working on Sensorimotor Psychotherapy for Children, Adolescents and Families with Dr. Bonnie Goldstein. Her current interests include group and couple therapy, child and family therapy, social justice, diversity, inclusion, shame, consciousness, and the philosophical/spiritual principles that underlie her work. To learn more about Pat’s work, visit:

Dr Frank Anderson

Dr Frank Anderson MD - Moderator

Frank Anderson, MD, completed his residency and was a clinical instructor in psychiatry at Harvard Medical School. He is a psychiatrist, psychotherapist, and published author, specializing in the treatment of trauma and dissociation and is passionate about teaching brain-based psychotherapy and integrating current neuroscience knowledge with the IFS model of therapy.

Dr. Anderson is a Lead Trainer at the IFS Institute with Richard Schwartz and maintains a long affiliation with Bessel van der Kolk’s Trauma Center. He serves as an advisor to the International Association of Trauma Professionals (IATP) and was the former chair and director of the Foundation for Self-Leadership. 

Dr. Anderson has lectured extensively on the Neurobiology of PTSD and Dissociation and wrote the chapter “Who’s Taking What” Connecting Neuroscience, Psychopharmacology and Internal Family Systems for Trauma in Internal Family Systems Therapy-New Dimensions, and recently co-authored Internal Family Systems Skills Training Manual. 

Dr. Anderson maintains a private practice in Concord, MA.


Day 1

Using IFS to Heal Generational Shame & Collective Legacy Burdens

According to Brené Brown, shame is insecurity that attaches to self-identity and gets in the way of action or vulnerability. It causes people to believe that they’re unworthy or unloveable. Generational shame is often caused by family secrets, fears of abandonment and long standing patterns of emotional denial or avoidance. In the Internal Family System (IFS) model, feelings of shame that are transferred from one generation to the next, are described as legacy burdens. A legacy burden is any belief or emotion passed down generationally through the family tree, ethnic lineage, or environment/society. We also carry historically shameful legacy burdens as a collective— to include racism, patriarchy, individualism, and materialism. These collective legacy burdens create sources of shame for entire societies and communities.

Rather than staying stuck in pain, guilt, shame or defensiveness, it’s important to recognize that we all have psychological wounds that stem from fear based “parts” of our personality that took on protective thoughts, feelings and behaviors passed down and around during our early years of social conditioning. The good news is that we can all be part of the solution by minimizing and reversing the personal, relational and collective impact of generational and historic shame.

  1. Explain now shame underpins the collective legacy burdens related to race, class, and gender and examine how these impact us individually, relationally, and systemically.
  2. Identify shame based messages that require compassionate witnessing to unburden and update your internal system.
  3. Utilize specific IFS techniques to begin healing painful narratives regarding shame, worthiness, and other related limiting beliefs.

“Being able to see myself as a worthy individual in our society and not carrying on the generational shame passed down when you're told that you're less than is something that I'm passionate about.”

“Healthy self-esteem is an internal sense of worth that pulls one neither into “better than” grandiosity nor “less than” shame.”

Day 2

From Shame to Connection: The Healing Power of Intimacy

Shame is a ubiquitous disorder in our relationship to ourselves. Healthy self-esteem is our capacity to hold ourselves warmly, tenderly, in the face of our all too human limitations and failures. We feel proportionately bad about our difficult behaviors, even character traits – remorse is healthy and keeps us human. But we don’t take ourselves apart, attacking who we are as people. The capacity to be both accountable and loving comes from parental transactions that held us this way and it is rare in our culture.

Many parents shame children because families exist in a shaming culture. Western society runs on, “The Great Lie,” – the delusion that one individual could be fundamentally inferior or superior to another.

Many clients escape shame by flights into grandiosity – shifting from feelings of helplessness to swollen power, inadequacy to attack – passing on the legacy of shame through emotional, and even physical, attack. Others self-medicate with substances or processes like sex – inflicting damage on themselves and on those who love them.

This workshop teaches participants that healthy self-esteem, the cure for shame, is actually relational. We hold ourselves as “same as,” – neither better nor worse than anyone else. Our clients can learn from us how to resist harshness and hold ourselves with loving firmness, learning from our imperfections rather than being ground down by them, learning to be accountable rather than defensive, how to come up from one-down shame and simultaneously down from one-up grandiosity. Real intimacy – with oneself and with others- dissolves shame. You cannot connect from either superiority or inferiority. Love demands democracy.

  1. Describe how to educate clients about the nature of healthy self-esteem, distinguishing it from our culture’s common forms of unhealthy self-esteem: performance-based, attribute-based, other-based.
  2. Distinguish between shame and guilt, which is healthy and directs us toward interpersonal repair.
  3. Describe how clients can intervene on self-attack, replacing harshness with loving accountability.
  4. Explain how clients can work directly on their relationship to themselves in much the same way they’d work on an external relationship.
  5. Describe how to heal the intergenerational legacy of trauma at the root of both shame and grandiosity.
  6. Explain the social context of The Great Lie, individually in our relationship to ourselves and also collectively as it manifests in issues like racism, misogyny, homophobia, as well as our dominant attitude toward nature itself. We will replace a power and control paradigm with one of collaboration or face potentially dire consequences, both personally and as a society.

Day 3

The Relational Nature of Shame: A Sensorimotor Psychotherapy Approach

Shame is a painful interpersonal emotion that develops in relationship with caregivers, significant other people, and and is impacted by socialization, racial trauma, and other forms of oppression dynamics. Exploring and resolving shame, especially pre- or non-verbal, chronic shame, can be challenging for even the most effective therapists and their clients.

This webinar explores some of the sources of shame, its impact on the body and nervous system as well as on patterns of emotions, thoughts and beliefs. We will address the various manifestations of shame, and how shame is often disguised and veiled, sometimes even to our clients themselves.

The first shameful encounters occur between the child and significant caregivers, and also involve societal dynamics of dominance and subjugation. Since these shame communications have powerful non-verbal components, involving prosody, eye contact, movement, facial expression and touch, we will explore how to work with the body to address and heal shame. With an emphasis on the relational nature of shame, special attention will be given to the importance of the therapeutic relationship, to privilege/oppression dynamics between therapist and client and to the importance of conceptualizing shame in therapy.

We will elucidate the difference between resourcing and processing shame, and will explore how movement and posture can help to counteract the deleterious effects of shame. Sensorimotor Psychotherapy approaches will be illustrated through case examples and brief experiential exercises.

  1. Analyze the impact of shame on posture and movement.
  2. List three ways shame can be disguised.
  3. Differentiate a somatic approach for resourcing shame from processing shame.
  4. Explain how gender socialization can contribute to shame.
  5. Debate the effect of shame on the nervous system.
  6. Discuss privilege, oppression and shame.
  7. Describe relational roadblocks to processing shame.
  8. Analyze the role of the body in healing shame.
  9. Analyze ways of working somatically with parts of the self in healing shame.

“Traumatized clients often experience rapid, dramatic, exhausting, and confusing shifts of intense emotional states, from dysregulated fear, anger, or even elation, to despair, helplessness, shame, or flat affect.”


We are happy to be able to offer scholarships to certain individuals and organizations.

Get Instant Access

Join our esteemed presenters Deran Young, Terry Real, and Pat Ogden for a careful examination of how we identify shame and its immediate, persistent, and generational impacts on our lives. This exclusive event features unique experiential content from these 3 leading experts, plus the opportunity to receive up to 9 CE/CPD Credits. 

Full Event Recordings

Receive instant, lifetime access to the full 3-day event recordings. Includes video recordings for the main presentations and warmups, plus audio recordings for the main presentations. Presenters slides and transcripts are also included.

*CE/CPD credits must be claimed by September 2023

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ADA Statement

If participants have special needs, reasonable accommodations will be made for persons who request them, consistent with ADA requirements.

Code of Ethics Statement

It is the responsibility of every attendee to abide by the standards set forth in the Code of Ethics for maintaining security and confidentiality of test materials and proprietary information presented as part of this continuing education program. Any materials used as part of this program may not be copied or otherwise distributed, and no proprietary information will be disclosed by attendees to any person not registered for this program.

Conflict of Interest Statement

There is no commercial support for this program nor are there any relationships between the CE Sponsor, presenting organization, presenter, program content, research, grants, or other funding that could reasonably be construed as conflicts of interest.

Utility/Validity Statement

The content of this presentation, when applied according to psychological practice guidelines, within the expertise of the expertise of the practitioner do not pose any risks.

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